My Ears

My ears. They’re undoubtedly my best and worst feature. They’ve always been one of my best assets but recently, they’ve started to cause me some grief.

So here’s everything you need to know about my ears. I’ve lost all perspective on what is good or bad about them. You decide.

  1. They’re beautiful.
  2. When they dry naturally, they get small crimps.
  3. Every time I have a drink, they get saturated. To the point where I leave a trail of water and I need human hands to wring them out.
  4. I got an ear infection from swimming. Long ear canals.
  5. If you can get a perfectly timed photo, they look like wings.
  6. They can be tied into a manbun.
  7. They’re very hairy. The vet told me so.
  8. They are unbelievably soft. They need to be touched.
  9. Their length means I need a snood when I eat. I’m either a monkey or an apple.
  10. I can do hair flips with them.




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